Interview with Sean
Sean how have you benefited from Fractal Therapy?
Before I came to see you every decision, big or small, was hard work for me. Every thought was hard work, because it had a certain amount of fear, anxiety and stress attached to it. So it was in one word a battle to live. People sometimes say “Oh, I have trouble getting up in the morning, I have trouble talking to people, I have trouble communicating with my family”. To me all of those things were a battle. This battle was very much internally fought. Outwardly I projected a nice person, but inside World War IV was going on. And it never seems to go away and you don’t see a way out of it and it feels like it’s just the way things are going to be forever.
With the benefit of hindsight I can say Fractal Therapy has been the best thing for me, when I look back at the despair I felt when I first came to see you. Six months on from the initial sessions, the difference is phenomenal in terms of not one aspect, but every aspect of my life, it is easier now, I have more energy, I have more focus, I’m more conversational with other people, more willing to take on board other people’s opinions as well as express my own.
I had lost my passion, passion for life in general, but also for my music and my creative side. My passion for getting up and going to work. My passion for close relationships, family. It’s a very distressing feeling to think that you’ve lost passion for the things in life that are the most important to you. It has been an overwhelming and exciting experience to feel my passion for life come back.
There’s definitely a clarity of thought that I didn’t have before, even over things in life that perhaps were puzzling, are now not puzzling. I find that my thought processes are strong where they should be. With bigger decisions my focus is on more important things rather than spending time collectively thinking about everything. My mind is not cluttered with lots of different things, it is more focused on what’s really necessary and what’s really important.
I’ve had increased energy levels and I am consistently more energetic throughout the day. I get to sleep better. I’ve probably never been physically fitter in my whole life than I am now, as well as mentally. Very much happier.
There is more purpose in my life. It’s more focused on where I want to be in five years’ time rather than where I want to be in the next five minutes. And that’s very important to me to have that. There’s a certain sense of freedom that’s come with this. I run a lot. I feel very good about myself.
There’s an excitement in the sense that I know I can take this further as well. I’m looking forward to future sessions, I’m driven. The early sessions were great and I feel it’s taken it’s time to finally work through. Now I’m at a point where I’ve broken through a certain level. I liked the fact that it is an experience you feel that works, I felt that in the first session that I had,
Have you observed any changes in your relationships?
It’s been easier to understand why, how and who I do and don’t love. I have definitely been closer in my attachment to my family which is fantastic. I guess it all comes from greater self-love and that has inspired me, I’m confident in applying that self-love to other people. I have a much greater understanding of the importance of certain people in my life and the importance of bringing new people into my life as well. I spent a lot of time alone before I came to you, now I don’t have that feeling of isolation. I love being alone, but I’m not lonely, because I’ve redeveloped that confidence that I used to have to engage with people.
What about your creativity, what is happening in that area of your life?
My creative life I think is in order when the rest of my life is in order. I feel that once the foundation of my life is in order then my creativity flows a lot better. I had lost a lot of energy for it. I can definitely feel that’s coming back which is extremely exciting. It’s a real blessing to know that it didn’t disappear entirely and along with the rest of my life it’s going through a resurgence.
How are you faring In terms of your work and productivity?
I am no longer just going to work and doing things without a purpose or just to make up time. Everything that I do in my job now has a purpose to it. So there’s no wasted time. It’s linked to a final goal, but it’s also about living in the moment, making sure that I’m not wasting the moment, as well as the fact that it has an end result. It’s consistently being able to work throughout the entire day. I need to speak to CEOs of companies, managing directors, directors of marketing and the main decision makers in business with confidence. I am confident about who I am and what I have got to offer and that is good for me. The whole process of the day of working, a week of working, a month of working is exciting, something I’m committed to. I find that when I get up in the morning I feel energized. I have more consistent energy throughout my working day and I go and do exercise after work. I have more consistency and really to even have that is a small miracle for me.
Are there any changes in how you experience your emotions or stress?
Yes, I think it’s very much less up and down; it’s much more in perspective as to how relevant or how much that pFractal Therapyicular thing may or may not mean, I have much greater confidence in able to deal with it, which is an amazing thing. I don’t think there’s been an event in the last four or five months that’s overpowered me. I couldn’t have said that probably over the last five or six years. I have much greater confidence that when an event isn’t going well, it’s not going to get me down. I’m much more equipped emotionally, mentally and physically to deal with it.
Has the way in which you experience fear changed?
In terms of volume of fear, yes, a huge amount. I guess fear is not so much a word that I associate with anymore, because when an event comes up these days and there’s potentially a fear or stress I have a much better mechanism to deal with it. I have been through a few pretty traumatic events in my life. Just knowing now that I am equipped to deal with these things makes all the difference . There are different ways I can now direct that energy, that I in the past was using to deal with all the stress and fear, I can channel it into more appropriate events like work, creativity, physical and mental things, diet, relationships, all of these things. I guess previously there were way too many old stresses, because my attention was always dealing with that fear and stress. Now it’s not such a big pFractal Therapy of my life. It’s a wonderful, wonderful feeling.
What about emotions like anger or aggression, how do you experience that?
Well, it’s funny because I guess I never considered myself to be an angry or aggressive person, and that may have been pFractal Therapy of the problem, holding a lot of those feelings inside. I’m still not someone who gets angry very easily. I think when you live in a fearful state of mind you tend to react aggressively or angry more quickly, and for me personally that was a little bit more internal sense. I’ve got clearer thought patterns, I’m more confident in what I’m saying, who I’m saying it to, and how I’m saying it. I think that’s probably the process. When it comes out I know it’s the right time and the right thing to say..
How do people respond to you then?
I think the key word is respect. It’s a nice feeling to have your own respect for yourself. In terms of how people respond to me, I think they respond to me in the way I have shown them, with respect and understanding.
Can you say how you experienced Fractal Therapy ?
My initial impression of getting help was “Oh, this is it; this is going to be the most gruelling, difficult process”. I had various pictures in my head about how I was going to be screaming on a bed, something like an exorcism. It has been so far from that, it’s been the most natural process I could imagine, which still astounds me, because it is not the picture I had in my head as to what was going to be happening. I thought that I had so many traumas and fears and stresses in my life that the only way that they were going to come out was to manifest themselves. It’s far from that. The process I guess is something you can feel is happening inside you. Not in a way that’s taxing, nor does it make you feel tired or depressed or anything like that. You can feel it happening inside you and it feels good. It feels like you’re digesting what has been there for ten years.
It was a strange thing because I knew what was happening, it’s like “wow” something’s happening which is really, really good. The process itself does feel like something’s happening internally. It’s unlike anything I’ve experienced before. You feel like somehow your body is like a computer or something and then internally things are being processed. The more you become free of your previous mental state, the more you become physically aware of your body. It is an experience you feel that works and I felt that in the first session that I had.
Thank you for taking the time to share your experiences.
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