Silent Screams: Living Daily with Anxiety

You are always trying to get away from something. You have a feeling of dread. Your instinct is to hide, lie low, become invisible, disappear.

Your fears may have been triggered by a critical parent, mean teacher, abusive boss, by being in an accident, or witnessing a violent attack. At the time of the events you may have been so shocked, that it felt unreal, like it didn’t really happen. Later on you may even think it wasn’t that important, or big a deal. You may put it behind you and forget all about it. This is denial, one of our most powerful defences.

But this original fear lives on inside your nervous system and soon you see dangers and threat around every corner. You are always prepared for an imminent attack, even when there is no real danger.

Our fear instinct tells us to run away to save ourselves, or to hide and keep still. As a result of this fear paralysis state we can find ourselves unable to move forward on our treasured life goals, which should be our inspiration; and on many diverse and unrelated matters even many years later. Our strict maths teacher is only a dim memory, but our childhood fears are now preventing us from paying bills, making phone calls, driving to the shops, even taking a vacation. We put off sensitive challenges like confronting a friend and a partner. We procrastinate. We may overcome one fear, only to be faced with another. You are putting out fires, only to find more burning elsewhere.

Once we have been hijacked by fear we hide from life itself. Our fear is bigger than we are, it has taken over and no matter how many times we try to overcome the fear, it is always there, living inside us. We lose confidence in ourselves, feel weak, small and intimidated by life’s challenges. In an attempt to overcome our original fear, we now imagine, create and act out fear every day.

‘I tell myself to calm down, act normal and be a rational human being, but my body just gets more tense, sweaty and shaky, my throat closes and I can’t get any air. This is SO embarrassing, I am sure the whole world can see right into my inner soul.’

The problem with overcoming fears is that our fears are instincts, which lie below conscious awareness. Our original traumas lie in the subconscious mind.

Often we cannot remember the original cause. The type of memory that holds fear is called implicit memory, or unconscious memory. And the part of our brain that processes emotion and fear does not understand language and is not responding to our instructions!

Often we have become so used to living with fear, we think of it as normal. Only when fear has been replaced by poise and confidence, do we realise the extent of our handicap.

How Fractal Therapy Gives You the Tools to Overcome Anxiety

All our fears originate from our survival fear reflex, the flight response. Our fear reflex is already active in our nervous system approximately 7 weeks after conception. This reflex is designed by nature to make us recognise and avoid danger. When the fear reflex becomes over active, it dominates our brain and keeps us in state of alertness, always on the lookout for the next threat. This makes the world look like a dangerous place and restricts our desire to explore the unknown and try new experiences. In its original form the fear reflex is called the fear paralysis reflex, which explains why fear is so paralysing.

When our fears are recreated or acted out it is called anxiety. When you have anxiety it means you are locked into a state of permanent fear, even when there is no actual real threat. Typically this is when we make mountains out of molehills. You put off doing your tax, you imagine it is going to be an insurmountable task, but when you do it, its actually easy. The mind has recreated a fear for you to overcome.

Fractal Therapy uses fractal body movements to balance the nervous system so that fear is no longer your dominant emotion. The fractal body movements activate the left and right brain. This activation allows these higher regions of the brain to start controlling the lower primitive regions of the brain where our fear reflexes are produced. The higher brain regions will inhibit and control the lower regions with logic and rational thinking.

This naturally allows confidence and boldness to emerge. Once the nervous system is balanced and no longer locked into fear, we are naturally more rational. Faced with any challenge, you will first think things through and then decide whether a fear is real, or imaginary. This enables you to say to yourself, “There’s nothing to be afraid of” and to your overcome old fears.

When confidence is your base emotion, it is easy to keep calm even under pressure. Although you may have many stressful events in one day, you don’t invest any energy in it. You take everything in your stride and focus on your desired outcomes. You do what needs doing.

You are relaxed and life feels like a pleasant, easy, comfortable ride. As your self -confidence grows you find yourself suddenly speaking up for yourself, something you have never have done before.

Boldness, bravery, confidence and pride are the counter-balancing emotions for fear. Once our mind is unlocked from fear, we discover how powerful we really are.